Where it all began...

Shooting Star Syndrome (SSS): An ailment characterized by a little voice inside of your head telling you that your life doesn’t have to be conventional, dull, full of work, or lacking in any way. It is always caught in early childhood from parental figures who tell children they can “be and do anything they want when they grow up.” Cure unknown.

I am lucky enough to have been raised by a mother who taught me to believe that I can do whatever I want with my life. She told me the world was at my fingertips. She sent me to school where guest speakers came to my classroom and told groups of enthralled children that they could work hard and become anything they wanted. The caveat:  their view of anything we wanted meant doing anything within reason.  Ironically, that part was left out. Maybe I was a slower child and didn’t pick up on to the “within reason” subtext. I often find myself wondering if I’d be happier or maybe more settled if I could become “okay” with a life that is lived “within reason” and one which revolves around a career and working hard until the weekend.

Everyone in my life would agree that I can’t stop talking about immersing myself in India, trekking through South American rain forests, lending a hand in Romanian orphanages, learning how to cook in Italy, running with the lions in Africa, getting lost in Bali, etc. I pinpoint my obsessive desires and dissatisfaction with a conventional life to the night my mother taught me how to wish on a shooting star. But, she left out the part that wishes don’t automatically come true because they were released into the sparkling sky as the death of a star is viewed. Psychologists say most of your wiring is set by 8 years old and I, like many, was wired with the shooting star syndrome.

                The fact of the matter is that a very large gap looms between what I know I should be doing with my life and what I am doing with my life. When I picture it, it’s deeper and wider than the Grand Canyon and it’s sneering at me.  I was raised to be optimistic but I was also enculturated by a society who puts career above adventure. My Mom, because she had no choice, assimilated me into a society that believes you go to school to get a career to make money to retire before you die. I tried this. I did the school thing, I got a degree, I started a career, but unlike some of my fellow United States dwellers, I’m panicking because something just doesn’t feel right.

                Recently, I have realized that my carefree and adventurous views on life don’t make me bizarre. I’ve discovered that there are a lot of us out there and we keep our desires a secret as if saying them out loud would make us feel more vulnerable than going to work naked.  Most of us are working everyday tapping our fingers on our desks and googling exotic places, just itching to make our escape.  For many of us, there is something holding us back. Some of us can’t figure what the leash is attached to so for simplicity’s sake we’ll call it fear. Personally, fear is holding my leash and it’s holding it tightly. So today, us fear prisoners are going to go out our front doors, breathe in the fresh air, ignore anyone who may be listening or standing nearby, and at the top of our lungs yell: “fuck you fear, I’m going on an adventure whether you want me to or not!”

                Now that we got that out of the way, it’s time for the really scary part. Make a plan and commit to it….